71 True Facts About Boys, That Girls Never Knew.

Article on Guys that Females never knew. if you really wish to understand about you guy, please spend the extra time reading this long post. It's meaningful. I read it, feeling how every guy would feel. Nodding the head in agreement, thinking who the hell is this Smartass which posted such a True & Interesting article.

Make the extra effort to understand more. Because this doesn't kills you, it makes you understand and makes you go into a deeper level of understanding towards boys/guys.

1. Guys are more emotional then you think, if they loved you at one point, it'll take them a lot longer then you think to let you go, and it hurts every second that they try.

2. Guys may be flirting around all day, but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

3. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

4. Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him.

5. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend or ex love-interest. Unless they're going for the let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-are method.

[Which almost never works]

6. A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.

7. Boyfriends need to be reassured often that they're still loved.

8. Guys don't care how gorgeous you are, if you're a bitch, .. GOODBYE!

9. Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?..uh...nevermind.." would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he'll assume he did something wrong and he'll obsess about it trying to figure it out.

10. Girls are guys' weaknesses.

11. Don't kick a guy in the crotch. Really, don't. It hurts, A LOT. And plus, its humiliating.

12. If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.

13. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.

14. Guys love it when you play with their hair.

15. Guys use words like hot or sexy to describe girls. They rarely use beautiful or gorgeous. If a guy uses that, he loves you or likes you a whole hell of a lot.

16. No matter how much guys talk about asses and boobs, personality is key.

17. Guys worry about the thin line between being compassionate and being whipped.

18. Guys think WAY too much. One small thing a girl does, even if she doesn't notice it, can make the guy think about it for hours, trying to figure out what it meant.

19. If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.

20. If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he's probably faking it and is spazzing inside.

21. When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is. Guys rarely say that.

22. If you ask us to be honest, don't get mad if we are, and you just don't like our answer.

23. If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn't happen that often, so when it does, you know something's up.

24. When a guy tells you that you are beautiful, don't say you aren't. It makes them want to stop telling you because they don't want you to disagree with them.

25. When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he's definitely thinking something.

26. When a guy tells a girl that they have a secret, It is usually about a girl. The girl the guy told knows the other girl.

27. Don't be a snob. Guys can be intimidated and give up easily.

28. Guys think its pretty cool when a girl knows everything about something we like. But its even cooler when they want to know about something we like.

29. Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions and are MAD confusing, but somehow are drawn even more to them.

30. Don't say , "I'm right because I'm a girl." Because its not true. If that was true, then The Bengals would have won the super bowl.

31. No guy can handle all his problems on his own. He's just too stubborn to admit it.

32. NOT ALL GUYS ARE ASSHOLES!!!

Just because ONE is a jackass doesn't mean he represents ALL of them.

33. Just like you don't like us talking about our ex girlfriends, don't talk about your exes either. It sucks.

34. Don't say things like, "I've given up on guys. They're all pricks. They're all the same." Because we aren't, and never will be.

35. Guys love neck rubs. And if he lets you keep doing it, it means that he really likes you, or his neck really hurts.

36. When a guy sacrifices his sleep and health just to be with you, he really likes you and wants to be with you as much as possible.

37. Even if you dump a guy months ago and he loved you when you were dating, he probably still does. And if he had one wish, it would be you to come back into his life.

38. Guys are just a self-conscious as you are. So don't talk about that guy over there with the huge muscles. it just makes us feel smaller. (Unless we are the dude with the muscle.)

39. The sexiest thing a girl can have is confidence. When we tell you you look great, don't tell us we're wrong, it makes us want to stop telling you.

40. Don't get mad when we hold the door open for you, we know you can do it yourself, but we're trying to prove Chivalry isn't dead.

41. Take advantage of the mood were in. If we are depressed, try to cheer us up. If we snap at you, don't try to help us, just sit there with us.

42. Lets us pay for you. Don't say 'i feel bad', we like to do it.

43 Kiss us when no ones watching. But if you kiss us in public, we'll be impressed.

44. You don't have to get dolled up every time we got out. If were dating you, it means we like you for who you are, not what you wear. (most of the time)

45. Don't take everything we say as 100% true. Sarcasm is a beautiful thing.

46. Stop using magazines and the media as your bible. We really don't care about how hot the Jonas brothers, or Brad Pitt, or whoever the hot celebrity of the day is.

47. Whatever happened to the word "handsome" or "beautiful"? I'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with "Hey handsome!" instead of "Hey baby/stud/cutie/sexy" or whatever other pet names you can think of.

48. And if you are being treated wrong by a guy, don't WAIT for him to change, because hes not going to. You either have to deal with it, or break up with him. Find someone who will treat you with utter respect. Someone who will honor your morals. Someone who can make you smile when you're at your lowest. Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.

49. Don't get your friends to ask us out. if you really want to date us, ask us yourselves.

50. No matter how often we tell you we don't care about your relationships with ex-boyfriends, we do.

51. We like it when you indulge us. Not constantly, but we like to know we've done something right, and be rewarded.

52. Nothing is worse than not being talked to. Don't use it as a punishment, it sucks more than you know.

53. If you have a problem with us, don't talk to a good friend. Talk to us. The friend only gets angry for you, and comes to us with that anger. When they yell at us, we get defensive and angry at YOU, because we assume that you would have talked to us first.

54. Don't insult us, even jokingly. It hurts.

55. Having someone put before of us, especially another guy, really does start stuff in our mind. We read into a lot, whether we should or not.

56. We almost ALWAYS feel our best isn't good enough for you. Make sure we know its more than enough for you.

57. Guys want to be your knight in shining armor. We do know sometimes it's best to listen, but it's really difficult to not try to save the day.

58. Guys like it when you touch their chests.

59. If we mess up, it will haunt us for weeks. Please, be forgiving. At the very least, let us try to make it up to you.

60. If we know you're upset... nothing else is right.

61. When a guy loves a girl, he'll go to surprising lengths to just be with her- in any setting.

62. Guys do listen. When we zone out, were usually thinking about what you just said.

63. Just because the last guy you dated screwed up, does not mean we will.

64. You do not have to wear gobs of makeup to impress us. Actually, we think you look better without it.

65. When breaking up, don't use the phrase, "You are the most [insert positive adjective] guy I've ever met." Because if we were, you wouldn't be breaking up with us.

66. We don't mind doing it, but its nice when we don't have to make the first move every single time. Because when we have to, it lowers our confidence level.

67. The sad truth- we are still only human. We WILL mess up and disappoint you at sometime, but the thing to remember is that we didn't mean to, and while an argument might be the first reaction, sometimes forgiveness is better. (and we also know that you will too.)

68. Most of the time, we care about the things you care about. Just because we don’t have an interest in it, doesn’t mean we don’t care... that you care.

69. If we mess up, and we know it, we'll do anything to get back in your good graces. And if we've been groveling for a week, stop making us feel like shit, because it does hurt, and we mean it when we say 'I'm sorry.''

70. We aren't stupid, we can tell there's something wrong just by the way you talk or you text.

71.Never ever forget a guy's instructions if they asked you to text them when you are done with something, because it will make them think that you don't care about them at all or don't want to bother about them.

72. Guys just want they woman to make them feel alive again.

73. Guys just like woman that are able to think in their shoes.

74. Guys just hate it when females starts pushing blame to themselves.

75. Guys have strong intuition also. They can feel things as much as females too.

76. Listen to what a guy have to say, because times like these, doesn't come by often.

(I added 72 - 76 by myself. That's what i feel about guys too. Or maybe that's what i feel from my own perspective.)

Today's a great day :D

HI EVERYBODY!

Today's a great day i tell you. Haha. The start of the day didn't turn out well. But it was better after that. Haha. I tell you uh, it's a super long story, & I'm freaking lazy to post about it. But for my reader's sake, i shall :/

Start of the day,

The match against Taiwan, I wasn't really feeling well. I was off-formed. I played like shit, even got scolded by Coach. But i realized, I'm always the main 7 up on court. Haha, & for the 30minutes half, Coach will only substitute me out less than 2 times. Because i had a very high stamina. Super hyperactive, run here run there, won't tired one. HAHAHA. So yah, starting match with Taiwan was like shit. But during the second match, the fun begins.

& Anyway,

if you've heard or seen how terrible Singapore has scored, you would have known why we were over-elated during the end of our last match! :D Haha. We were playing our first half with Hongkong, some were on-form, but some wasn't. & for the 1st half, we ended off with a score of 28 - 10. Singapore only got 10. Then coach said something like, "If this continues, & we maintain like this, the final score would be 58 - 20. Nobody wants that right? So everyone put in your last effort, and fight for it." Something like this, & everyone was motivating and encouraging each other. On court, i told myself, "No matter what, please do not give up on yourself Oscar. I believe you can do it." Haha. You gotta speak to your inner-conscious to keep moving on strong.

Then on court,

We started to get on form. Motivating one another subsequently. With the never give up attitude. Then the 2nd Leg started. Our defense tightened like HELL! The hongkong players were fussing over the match. I swear they seriously was! :D They couldn't cut through us. If they came near, we'd pressure and checked them, making them feel pressured, thus, dropping the ball or passing it away immediately. They didn't form any kind of threats. So we got more confident as we see the faces on them. They were left with no choice, almost having a Passive Play twice in a row.

How about that y'all?! :D
Almost having to Passive Twice in a row. That's real bad. I turned & saw their Coach, he was kneeling on the ground. One knee touching the floor, the other one stomping the ground. I think he expected the Hongkong boys to do much better than that. So in the first match, Singapore's score was 28 : 10. Score Difference of 18. But after the second Leg, The final score was 44 : 24. So taking away the score from the first half, the score for the Second Half was 16 : 14. Our Score Difference was only 2! See the improvement now? The 'Never-Give-Up' attitude of the Singapore Youth Handball Team. So the match finished, we might have lost, but we were celebrating. Because of the Score Difference & our target to not let them exceed the 45 Point Mark. & not be thrashed by them by half again. Because all of our Games, we got thrashed by at least half the score. But for our last match, we managed to pull out a great show. I scored 4 - 5 Goals for that match.

&,

Approximately 7 - 8 goals for the tournament.

Ohgosh, My target was actually just being able to score one for each game can already. But now, I've got 7 - 8 Goals. AN ACCOMPLISHMENT INDEED! :D Haha. & now, I'm entire body's aching from the runs, sprints and accidental incidents. Like being hit on the Jaw by the Hongkong Player. Swollen & Bruised on my right Jaw. PAIN! Being knee-d by Shuaige from Taiwan. (That's his nickname, but he's really good-looking.) & other subsequent injuries lah. This should be the end of the post already. Think that the boys are gonna get a one week break from Handball. Haha. YAYY!~ RELAX TIMEEE!

P/s: It took me 3 days to post such a short post. Weird right? Because everytime i post halfway, i get distracted & will go facebooking or whatever. Then never care about blogger. I saved as draft everytime. So the date is on 29th January. Haha. But actually, it's 31st already ._. that just simply shows how lazy i am :/ WTH.!

& Fyi,
I don't find blogging as interesting as before already. Because my hit counters dropped drastically & it's not climbing back up. Unless if everyone can help me spread word around, that my blog has reopened already. Haha. Thanks! :D

Tensed up :/

I heard about this article about Youth Olympians will be able to get a free phone. Samsung Omnia Lite. This is the website.

http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/1032448/1/.html

Tournament was tough.

I was nervous. Hell nervous. My palms was wet. My legs was shivering. I wasn't performing up to standards. I don't know. I felt pressured with the crowds. Usually, there wouldn't be so many people watching our Trainings or Friendly Games. But Yesterday, My family was there, Regent Handball was there, My Bestfriend was there. (& you was there.)

The Spotlight,

The Supporters, The Sound of the player's shoes rubbing against the court, The Voice of the Commentator, The Shouts across the court from the Coach, & many others more. The pressure is just humongous. I have to get used to this. I have to. The Chinese Taipei players, were the boys that we met on our trip to taiwan. We knew them all. They knew partial of us too. Bo feng was there too. He was sort of like my shifu in taiwan. He taught me the Winger shots, how do wingers run & positions all these. He's damn nice. & he was on court that day too.

I was fine for the entire match, no injuries.

Except for the last ball, i got knee-d on my thigh, my leg softened, & i couldn't really walk. My thigh muscle couldn't support my body weight. I almost fell on the floor 2 times when i was home. It's like my thigh muscle aren't working @ all. It hurt, real bad. I get i can't really play for today's match :/ Sigh.

Singapore Youth Handball 2010 (SYH) @ Suntec ICC Hall 602

HELLOHELLLLLOOOOOOOOOOO!

I'm here to post again. Anyway, i'm here to post about the Handball Tournament that's coming up. Haha. & Here it is.

Singapore will be having it's first ever National Handball Tournament on 26, 27 & 28 January 2010. It's open to public. & guess what? IT'S FREE. It'll be @ Suntec ICC Hall 602. This are the timings that Singapore Will be playing :

26January, 20:00 - 21:45 (Singapore Boys Vs Taipei Boys)

27January, 20:00 - 21.45 (Singapore Boys Vs Hong Kong Boys)

28January, 12:00 - 13:45 (Singapore Boys Vs Taipei Boys)

28January, 18:00 - 19:45 (Singapore Boys Vs Hongkong Boys)

Please do come down & support. If you're lucky, you might simply just get to see me in action :X HAHAHA. I'll be playing as the Left Winger (Guess you don't understand). Jersey Number 4. But Singapore might not really have a chance to win. They've been playing for 9 years already, while the SIngapore Handball Team only started 1 year ago. it's for the experience yeah? :X Anyway, pleasepleaseplease do come down to support. It's on our home-ground & we need supporters. Please give me a text/call if you're coming. @ 93651795. I'll be there in the morning to help out. While the allocated timings, i'll be playing. Haha. Please do send me a text earlier to tell me if you're going or not. Haha.

Anyway,

If you're able to make it there. I might not be able to come find you unless if i'm there early & it isn't my game yet. Haha. I could find you for a while. Haha. But i might need to entertain the People there. Haha. So yah, might be quite busy :D Haha. But just give me a text if you have any inquiries or problems. Thanks. Anyway, if you don't know how to get to Suntec ICC Hall 602. Please go to http://www.tdc.sg/venues/?vid=4913 to find out more. Or simply go to http://www.streetdirectory.com/asia_travel/travel/travel_id_8245/travel_site_31/ . Haha. See you thereee! :D

I'm sorry it ended even before it started.

Get the damn facts right before the finger starts pointing.

You all think i'm happy isn't it? You think i wanted this to happen? You all think i don't feel a thing that i caused it to happen? I'm sorry, please wake up and see for yourself. None of you saw what i went through for the past 2 days. People around/with me, don't even know. In other words, i don't feel good either.

i wanted to find someone to talk to,

but i didn't. Because i was thinking, what they hell would they know/understand if i told them what's wrong with me? Have they even gone through what i experienced for the past 2 days? They might have gone through, but do they still feel it like they're experiencing the feeling they used to have felt? Or do they even understand what kind of feelings it really is? Or do they claim that they understand, but in fact they don't? & they claimed they understand, because they wanted you to confide in them. But they're just trying to help.

I'm sorry,

if i rejected to talk to anyone of you who's trying to help me. I was just feeling, unstable.

It's late,

I ought to be in bed now. But i can't. I lay down here, waiting & hoping to fall asleep, right now.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that i broke your heart.
I know no much words could make you feel better. But, i'm not confident in my own doings. It's not you, i swear it isn't. The problem lies with me. I'm afraid of commitment, i'm afraid i might not be able to stay faithful. I'm afraid of set-backs. It's better to end earlier, than to drag it. You see, I'm not how you used to think i were. I'm not all nice, all sweet or others. I'm not ready to fall in love yet. My mind doesn't wanna fall in love, but my heart does. So, it becomes a mixed up feeling. I'm sorry i confessed to you too soon. We shouldn't have confessed so soon. I remembered telling you, i didn't want to confess, because i wanted to be sure of my feelings first. But in the end, i confessed. It was a short term. This was what i was afraid of. I'm afraid it would only last a moment.

It's better to end now, than later. Because this is your very important year. It's your O's. If i end later, i'm afraid it might all be just too late already. I'm sorry, please be strong. & like you said, you'll sever ties, to get over me. Okay, i'll agree and respect your decision. But please promise, you'll be strong. Please.

Feeling of being, so afraid.

I'm afraid,

I'm afraid, it might be lust.

I'm afraid, i might hurt you.

I'm afraid, i might not be faithful.

I'm afraid, you might be distracted.

I'm afraid, i might be a bad influence to you.

I'm afraid, i might do the wrong things with you.

I'm afraid, you wouldn't be ablt to concentrate for Olevels.

I'm afraid of so many things.

But idk. My mind doesn't want to get into a relationship. But my heart does.

Singapore 1st Youth Handball Tournament.

Singapore's 1st Handball Tournament Poster

Fixtures/Time For The Tournament.

Singapore Boys Team will be playing on No: 4, 8, 10, 12.

If you interested/free, you can come watch for free (I think). This event will be opened to public. Please ask your friends, your family, your whoever, or even strangers to come watch. Everyone can come! :D So if you're free, please come to Suntec ICC Hall 602 on 26, 27, 28 January 2010.

I'll be playing as the Winger.

Meaning the attacking left side. If you're lucky, you'll get to see me! :X HAHAHA. Heard from Mr Gabriel that he'll be bringing the Entire Regent Handball Boys down to watch. It's gonna be an intensifying match. So please come watch. Hongkong & Taiwan have played for at least 9 YEARS. While Singapore just started 1 year ago. Please wish us all the best. Thanks.

For any enquiries or questions.
You can tag @ the side of the tagboard. & I'll reply to you as soon as possible. Thanks.

Singapore might not be able to win this tournament.
But it's for the experience.

It's part of their everyday life as they learn Handball Since Primary school & also as a PE lesson.

Pray for me.

Alright,

Love's forcing me to post! :X HAHAHA. But i'm super lazy. She super cute i tell you. I told her i don't want to post. Then she was like, "GO POST LAH TAOYANNNN!~" Haha, no lah. She just kept asking me to post, because she wants to read. Then i really lazy mah, then this was what beloved said, "You tell me goodnight on the post. Just one sentence." Haha. So cute right? I lazy to post, then she asked me to post just one sentence. To tell her goodnight :X HAHAHA. & it was all solely because she wanted to read my post. Haha.

Alright.
Today's training cum friendly match @ NUS was quite tiring. Was sick, so had a really hard time focusing. The sun was blazing & scorching hot! Dang. & as you know, energy cannot be destroyed or created, but can only be transferred. So my previous trainings, i was complaining, saying the sun sucked my energy away. So everyone started laughing. Because i said the Sun sucked away my energy, & someone said, 'Wah, damn smart. Energy cannot be created or destroyed, but it can be transferred.' Actually i also don't know what's so funny about that. But @ the period of time i just found it funny ._.

So yah,

Today had friend with NUS Raffles Halls. We've played with quite a few of the NUS teams already. Played with Kent Ridge, Eusoff & Raffles. & I'm sure everyone would have realized that majority of my posts has got something about the Handball. Handball is slowly overtaking my blog man :/

Ahh,

shit. I don't wanna post about handball today. So after handball, went to eat with the boys @ the NUS cafeteria. After that left for home soon. & so i was texting with love while on the way home on the bus. Haha. Was super tired. So reached home. Then slept all the way till the evening, & was awoken by my brother to go find Mama @ Amk. She says wanna go shopping but in the end, didn't really buy any clothes @ all. Due to some personal reasons. So yah, went back home. & soon, here i am posting.

I don't really wanna post a long post you see.

Haha Because i'm unwell (& I'll use this as an excuse to not post a long one when i'm sick, but you see, i'm just plain lazyyyy! :D ) HAHAHA. Tomorrow i'm free. So ask me out soon, before i get into the goddamn ITE. Please pray for me, pray that i will get to retain, & i wouldn't need to go for ITE. Pleaseeeee ): You'll never regret that you helped me to pray. Because i'll work muchmuchmuch more harder if i get this second chance. I really do need it. Please.

God, or whoever out there that can hear me.
Please bless me. Allow me to have another chance to repeat Secondary4. Please don't do this to me. I really need this. My family has financial problems, so i can't take Private. So i'll only hope for a 2nd chance in Sec4. Please please please god or whoever out there. Give me another chance. :/

Before i go off,

Goodnight, love.

Fuck all these thaat are coming to me all @ once.

I don't feel like posting about today.
But i have to :/ I was woken up by Pengkoon. He gave a a phone call, asking me to accompany him to school to check about his retaining application. Then i agreed, but soon later. Terror arrived. We were still texting, when he suddenly told me, he's got a good news. The Vice-Principal has called him already. & has asked him to go back down to school on Monday. But for me, she called, but told me to get ready for a Second Option. She asked me to submit my JAE. But she didn't tell me anything about the interview.

I panicked.

I was afraid. I really was. I was in an unclear state of mind. I wasn't doing what my mind was telling to do. I was losing control, I swear i really was. I started doing things that i didn't want to do. I sent harsh and hurtful messages. I was afraid, i wouldn't be able to retain. I placed all my hopes so high, & it all came crashing down on me. It hit me hard, real hard. I fell onto the ground, & i'm thinking of how i'm gonna pick myself up after this blow. I'm afraid, i dare not carry on. I thought, maybe by having another year, i could do better, & maybe i could excel. But this hope, is gone.

I went back to school,

In a very unstable state. My tears was forming up on my eyelashes. I walked into the school. Headed to the Sewing Room to find Mr Gabriel, i talked to him less than 5 seconds. I broke down. He knew nothing about what happened to me. The previous night, i just had a tiff with my mum. She doesn't trust me. & she doesn't believe in anything i said. I said i'll retain, and strive for better results. Guess what, which parent would discourage you, and doubt you? Every parent would encourage their kid in whatever they want and wishes to pursue. But guess what? Mine doubts that i can make it again.

When all my hopes and faith have all crushed down,

I need my loved ones to pick me up again. But this is what they give it to me. I don't need this, i need none of it. If you're going to worsen it, forget it. & keep it all for yourself. I never needed a family to break all my hopes and discourage me. I don't need, & i don't want any of this. I'm getting sick just stressing myself about this. I'm down with quite a warm body temperature, cough, flu, headache. & my migraine is all coming back. I'm getting so sick and tired of all this bullshit. I really am.

Fuck this, fuck life, fuck school.

Sickkkk :/

Long posts bore me much.

It's nice reading one entire one if it's about you. Or maybe long interesting ones. But it kills me again and again to post one long one. I'm just lazy you see. Okay, short post today peeps! I'm sick ._. Down with quite a severe cough, when i cough, the diaphragm compresses, then it feels damn painful :/ It'll be torture for every cough that i give out. I wanna make this post short. I shall not post about the Training cum Friendly match against Eusoff hall @ NUS today. Too long le. My mucus keeps flowingggg ._. Damn irritating. I damn cold now nah :/ Cannot tahan.

Anyway,

today went back to school to hand up the Form To Appeal For Retain. Wore the HFS shirt, plus an ordinary pants. Went to Lot1 with my broken slippers, walked into Cotton On, bought a red slippers again, & went to change. So after that, went back too school. Went to find gabriel & handed up the Form. We chat for quite awhile. Then was actually supposed to meet my beloved one, but didn't have the time. She had dance in school, so yah, couldn't meet her up for awhile loh. But it's okay, there'll still be a next time right beloved? :D

Thanks for caring so much for me aye? :D

I know you treat me well. I'll cut down for you, beloved. Okay? It's hard, so I'm gonna need you by my side during the period of cutting down on my daily habits. From one pack a day, to a few sticks. Then slowly, to none. Okay? DO remember to remind me everytime okay? :D When the temptation kicks in again, do whisper in my ears and tell me what i need to hear okay? :D I'm sure i'll makek it through. Okay? :D

Trust me, trust you girl.

& i said the same thing every single time.

HOMEHOMEHOMEEE!

Today had a longggggggggggggggggggggggg day. But it was well spent today. Oh wait, shit! I think i'm gonna have sorethroat soon. My throat hurting ): Damn pain i tell you ): Don't know why suddenly like that. ): I also didn't eat any heaty food ): But it's hurting like hell lahhzxzx ! ): Hope tomorrow will wake up with the sorethroat gone):

Ah fag,

forget about complaining. I've still got a long post to post about. So i went back to school today. For the Handball Filming. First we went to play ball first. Then after awhile, the filming crew came. So yah, all went to the classroom @ 1-1. Except Me, Alvin, Dragon, Joseph & Shengda. We couldn't really be part of it because we've graduated already. Actually, a nicer way is to say graduate, but another way is to say we're not in the school already. Maybe I might still be back. But Joseph & Jo say they won't be retaining. They got their own mindset, so yah. Wish them all the best lah. So went to classroom, the stars were Jonathan & Junming. Aiyah, always bias one. Nehmind ._. Forget it. Then finally they put me to good use ! :D HAHAHA. Then they needed a fight scene. Haha, So the plan was, I walk to bernice take number, (It's all in the show only ._. ) Then Junming not happy, because Bernice was Junming's GIRLFRIEND! :X HAHAHAHA. You had no idea how much we laughed when we have to to act out Junming saying Bernice his girlfriend! :X HAHAHA. Then we outside de those few, asked Junming & Jon comeout to fight. Then Pritpal & Shahmel side them one, so came out fight also. So they 4 fight against us around 5.

Haha,

But it's just a fake fight only lah. Haha, no hard feelings. It's all for show only. Haha. It's a Re-Enactment you see. HAHAHA. But very the funny, we acting the fight first part, Junming whack till my head already ._. HAHAHA! PAIN SIAH! His arms stretched and extend out full force because wanna push me away, then he hit till my jaw. Haha, yesterday play Handball also hit till my Jaw. HAHAHA. I think Junming see me not happy! :X HAHAHAHA! Okay, but after that of course he apologised lah. Haha. So all these all that. then i shall skip to better parts lah.

Haha,

So after the classroom scene, it's training time! :D Haha, Then we have to act out our very first time when we got our jersey. So @ there act le. Got a few NGs lah. HAHA. Cause keep laughing. Especially me. NEHNEH, i can't control, and keep giggling. Then also got one part, we play a game, then must gather, then must act like we not happy with one another. That's the part which i laughed the most i tell you. Idk why also. But i just find it funny acting. I'm not the 'acting in front of camera' type. HAHAHA! Then we must act like we're quarrelling. My team not happy with his team. So all these and all that. Then after that is others that i can't remember as it's just far distance. Like taking the video when we warm up and play friendly against each other! :D HAHAHA.

Everyone around the school,

was actually looking @ us. Because got the filming camera mah. Haha. Very obvious. From somewhere around 3 film till 7 plus. Film till school close niao. HAHAHA. But didn't film finish everything. They'll be getting back next week to continue the film again.

Tired after all these training loh.

Haha. Too bad beloved wasn't here with me. If not i think she also will laugh de. Haha. She went studying with her friends @ lot1 library. Beloved, jiayou okay? I'll help you with your dnt. But not totally okay? You must put in your own effort too! :D Okay? :D Tomorrow we might be going out together. But not confirm yet. Maybe going to vivo with Gordon and Shunling to celebrate their 1st month. Haha. Then going to find Joseph. Haha. But maybe not. Because beloved still have school tomorrow. Haha.

OHOHOH!

I JUST REALISED CANNOT GO OUT LE. Cause i'm having my Youth Trainings on 14th January. Wah, sorry beloved! I just checked the HFS boys blog. WAHHHH! Really sadd lah. I still thought tomorrow could go out with youuuu. ): Nevermind, there'll be a next time one okay ? :D I know there'll be even more coming up. Haha.

I gotta go sleep now le.

Cause my mama nagging just now. Haha. OHOHOH!

Reminder to self,

Please remember to go to Regent tomorrow to hand up retain form.

Tomorrow deadline. Please do not drag anymore, it's for your own good.

Imisssyou.

(youknowwhoyouare:D)

Friends that don't know me thinks i'm quiet, but friends that knows me wish i am

I just felt like posting this picture.
Haha. I like this photo! This was the photo takened @ my family chalet on the 2nd Night. Haha. I think my smile is great for this picture. This kinda smile don't really come often. Haha. Relaxed & Nice! :D HAHAHA.

Okayokay,

Just now back @ school for Handball. Coach the boys how to play this and that. Then after that had debrief. Mr Gabriel then told us that tomorrow all the Old Boys have to be there. Need to go back to Regent for some filming things for MOE. Heard that it'll be published in all schools for assembly or something. Haha. Cool, then some day you'll see me famous! :D Mr Gabriel told us the stars will be Junming & Jon.again

I don't know whether I'll be in it or not. But just hope I'll be. But I'm not a good actor.Cause we'll have to do a Re-Enactment on how we used to be last time. I think. But have to reach school @ 2.45pm. & will end @ 7 plus. Due to the N.G here and there. I think there'll be alot of retakes. If you know me, I'm the hyperactive type. You can't ask me to be serious and suddenly start acting. I'll guarantee you i can't do it. I'll keep smiling, then NG & retake. Then I'll burst into laughter again ._. So you see, it's difficult, for me. Haha.

So yah,

After training, met up with beloved. Then sat by the bus-stop, & waited for the rest to board the bus, then we walked to Yewtee. Went to tap in card there, Beloved didn't have enough money to come in, so went to top up card and came in. So we took the train to Lot1, then went to the interchange, & waited for the bus. I sent Beloved till the house Bus-stop there, then you went off. & i sat the bus back to Lot1. So after that, was spamming messages to your phone, but you couldn't reply due to your phone having left with 7cents. & so, spammed all the way from there to Yewtee, till back home. & suddenly my phone vibrated. & It was from you :D Haha. You used your Mama & Papa's phone to text me. How sweet of you! :D Haha.

Oh,

I wanted to tell you, you still look as pretty as you are in School Uniform :D No matter what you put on on you, it'll just look great. Even if it's an old rugged piece of Your beautiful smile, your long hair, & your mesmerizing eyes :D They don't see the beauty in you as much as i do. Because you're uncommon, unique, & you're one of a kind. Please bear this in mind. :D

P/s: Incase if you're wondering if i'm attached or not. I'm not, for now. But there's someone that i'm fond of. & she's fond of me too i think :D We will see how things go first. Before stepping into a relationship. Haha. But don't worry readers! I'll update on the latest news of us :x HAHAHA. So do stay tuned! :D

Oh, just being random,

I'd hope for and want a Bestfriend + Lovers kinda relationship, that both of us can simply keep talking for hours about daily life things and it'll never seem to end. & they can always talk to each other about problems or whatsoever. & that's rubbish right? Who wouldn't want such a relationship? It's much better.

Thank you, Mr gabriel

I was woken up by ringtone of my phone.
I answered it, it was Mr gabriel. My school's OM cum School's Handball Teacher-In-Charge cum Discipline Teacher. He said, "Hey, so have you discussed with your Mum about retaining already?" I replied yeah. He told me I can combine subjects if i retain. Meaning, I'll only take a few subjects his year. I'll use my this current O'levels English & D&T. So I'll just take 3 more subjects. & I'll just concentrate on these three subjects. From things that are going now. The 3 subjects should be Maths, Combined Science (Physics & Chemistry) & Chinese/Poa.

Mr Gabriel says,

He's helped talked to Mrs Tong (Regent's Vice-Principal), & she has already agreed to allow me to retain already. Mr Gabriel has also promised to take full responsibility for my well being in school. So if i don't anything in school, i'll be handled by him personally. But now, the only thing is my mum. They need my actual parent to go down to see the Vice-Principal. Guardian cannot. & my mum don't usually care about my school's stuffs ones. So i'll have to call to arrange a meeting with the Vice-Principal regarding this matter.

I'm going to school for handball now already. Will post up again when i'm back :D

Regardless of what the outcome is, Please do not give up on me.

I've received my O'levels Result.

I don't know how to describe my feelings/mood. I'm semi-contented. But semi-crushed by the results. Although I've already knew what the outcome is, i was still feelings nervous. By nature, normal human beings would be anxious about receiving their Results Slip. So i sat by the hall. I was the last person queuing up for the Result Slip. They announced the top scorers, & did a briefing. Then, it was the moment of truth. They had to give the results by Index Numbers. My index was 38, 3rd in class. So i could only wait till my turn.

Soon,

It was my turn already. As i stood by the side, i saw so many people, with the expressions that i described in the previous posts. Friends of mine was crying Tears Of Joy, while some were crying Tears Of Pain. I seriously was afraid @ the very moment. I knew it'd be one of them. I sat down, it wasn't Mrs Gan in front of me. It was some other teacher. Mrs Gan had to undergo surgery on the very day that we took our results. As i sat there, she gave me my photo-copied result, & told me, 'You can't get your results unless you pay your library fines.' So i couldn't get the original one, except the photocopied one. Unless i pay the fine, & show the receipt. Then i remembered, Yvonne told me she used my card to borrow the books. So i went to look for Yvonne. Then i couldn't find her, so i went to find Yuxiang to talk. Then i didn't look @ my results. So i sat, & looked. & i saw a miracle. & i saw this.

I swear i was shocked when i saw that.

I didn't expect to have gotten a A2. Because, when they were briefing, the Principal said, "Only 4% of the O'levels takers score a distinction for English Language, & .. " There was only 1 person that scored A1 for English, & 7 person that scored A2. & guess what,

I was one of the Lucky Seven

Perhaps it was the prayer that i made in the morning. Although i don't believe in any religions. I just made one, hoping to be blessed. & indeed i was, but only in 2 subjects. I only passed English & D&T. I got a B3 for D&T. The rest, i failed. But nevertheless, i still made improvements. Because for L1R4, i scored 41 for midyear, 34 for prelim, & now 27 for O'levels. I improved by 7 everytime. Perhaps by next year, if I'm given this chance to retake it again. I'll promise to score better. Much better than this time. I wouldn't disappoint anyone. I'll score maximum 20 points. I'll pass Maths & Science. & I'll need one more subject. Now for English & D&T, I've got 5 points already. & for L1R4, i need another 3 subjects. So it shall be Maths, Combined Sciences (Physics & Chemistry) & just one more Subject. I'm planning whether to take POA, Combine Humanities or Mother Tongue.

But,

I'm fortunate enough, & I'm able to retain. I'll promise to work harder next year for O'levels. I've got 5 points now for English & D&T add up. Now i need another 15 points and below to reach my target. 15 points for 3 subjects. It should still be okay. I believe i can make it :D

F. I just had a short quarrel with my mother again.

Due to the results. But she just never seemsto look @ the good ones first. She'll scold & scold. I told her I'll retain to achieve better result. & She sort of doubts that i'll study hard. But in the end, i persuaded her to believe, i'll do well if i have one more year. I've disappointed quite a few people, but also shocked quite a few too. This year, i guarantee you, you'll be seeing a different me. I shall dominate & show the world, I'll get maximum a 20 pointer. or maybe a 15 pointer ! :D YIPEEEE.

Alright,

I shall stop my crap about dominating the world ._. Anyway, this are my results.

A nightmare you wished you never made.

3 more hours,

To the release of the O'levels results. Please god, or whoever who there. Bless me. I already know the outcome of my results. I just hope i can get the second chance to retain for another year. I don't care if other people despise me because i retain.

I regretted,

That i realised the tension of Olevels too late. Too late to mend on my mistakes. Midyear examinations, L1B4 - 41. Where could i go with such tremendous results? Nowhere. I doubt so that ITE will accept me. I started mugging for Prelims. Then for L1B4, i scored 34. An improvement, but not good enough in time for Olevels. I mugged @ home. I started asking people out to study together with me. Because I'm not the type that studies alone. I can't study alone, @ that period of time. I said i couldn't study alone, because i knew not a single thing about the subjects. I flunked my Maths from Sec1 - Sec4. Never passed once before. I only excel in some on the Maths topics. Like probability. But i can't do trigonometry. I don't understand why I'm like this. I wanna change for the better sake, that's why I'm praying for a second chance. Please god, or whoever. Give me another try. I'm a free-thinker. So I'm praying out to all the gods out there that could hear me.

I'm thinking about all the situation,

& the atmosphere of the area. There would be so many people crying tears of joy, or crying tears of pain, & regret. There's only two emotion outburst you'll experience when you get your Olevel results. You'll be super happy, because you made it, or you got your expected scores. Or, you'll feel your heart & body just dropped a thousand floors, & the fear of getting hit on the floor will stay in you eventually till you hit the ground. Pain will wrap your body, soul & mind.

There's also two ways of walking home.

• You'll either be jumping for joy home, gripping onto the results slip, till the sweat in your palms dissolves in your Result Slip. You'll be over the moon. Whoever that you see, you'd asked, 'Hey! How much you get?' You'll be so happy, that you can't stop smiling. Your mouth never seems to get tired just smiling or laughing. You didn't want to keep your Result Slip in your bag. Because you wished someone who come to you and asked how much you've scored, & you'll just stretched your hand straight, & let them see it. You're as clear and as alert as you previously used to be before getting the Result Slip. & Normally, your 20 minutes journey home, seemed like a 2 minute one. When you reached home, you looked through the courses that you're illegible for. & Now, you choose the courses. Not the courses choose you. You can't wait to let your parents know about this. You'll wish this feeling last forever.

• You'll be walking home, with your head down, staring @ the result slip. Tears might be at the tip of your eyeballs. It might just fall and hit the result slip with a movement of your eye. Your eyes are nailed onto the results slip. You just can't stop thinking about it. You regretted you didn't study well. You almost hit into a wall, & your friend pulled you away. You were too focused onto the result slip. You never felt this focused before. So focused, that you couldn't take notice of your surroundings. So focused, that you can't hear your friend calling out to you when you're crossing the road as there's an oncoming vehicle travelling towards you. Your heart sank to the core of the sea bed, & you just can't seemed to get it back. Every little inch it sunk, your mood just goes with it. & Normally, your 20 minutes journey home, seemed like it's taking forever. When you reached home, you look through the courses you're illegible for. & you realised, it's the courses that choose you. & you can't get into the course that you want. & You wished your parents will never know about your results. & you wished it was just a Nightmare, or A Scary Dream.

P/s: If you see your friend being the 2nd one. & you scored the marks that you wished for. Please, do not go to them, console them & tell them, 'I know how you feel.' Because you actually don't. By doing this, a quarrel might occur. You might feel that you've been in this before. Because you might have failed the Ordinary Common Tests or any others. But those CA1, SA1, CA2, & SA2 can't be compared to a National Exam. So, please be considerate & put yourself into their shoes. & try to understand how they feel. You could console, but never say the wrong words. Think, if you were them, what would you not wish to hear? Then don't say that. Perhaps, you can spend time with your broken-hearted friend, & try to get his mind out of that current state.

Pissed off, seriously pissed.

I'm getting pissed,
@ a message, which i don't understand. But it insulted me, making it sound like a was some kind of bad influence. It's just a goddamn birthday party, not a gang fight. You're making it sound like as if one day to celebrate her birthday, will destroy her entire life. I want the best for the person that i'm fond of. & i'll never do anything intentional to hurt her. So don't make it sound like as if i'm some kind of assholes to break people's future or life. Fuck.

Fuck this.

Your friend's message left me speechless.

I don't understand what she said. But somehow and somewhat, it hurt me. What does she mean by 'Not everything about her is written down there.' What's the everything that she refers to? Is it love, is it life, is it friends, is it you, or is it me? Wth. It seriously spoiled my mood. Yet i can't find anyone to talk to. You're asleep & you have school tomorrow. Your friend told me, 'There is no relation between you and her. Perhaps friends or close friends.' So who the hell should i believe now? From that day onwards, i've never treated you just friends. You slowly started to be a part in my life. But i still don't know about you yet. So am i someone important to you? Or am i just a substitute? So what is this about now? Did she say this, because she didn't know enough about the both of us. Or is it because she said this, because there's still something that you have yet to tell me yet. Or is it that i got the wrong meaning? I'm fucking paranoid right now. I need you to explain everything to me, right now. I don't suppose you have a single idea what's going on now huh? Neither do i. Maybe it's because, your friend doesn't know much. & started saying some nonsense. Or maybe like i said, it's because i got the wrong meaning. But this is the first time, someone said something to me, i don't understand a single shit about it, but from what the message says, it's disturbed and it pissed me off. Yah, i might get the wrong idea. But still, it might be because of your message wasn't written correctly. I need this to be explained to me now. Or my mood will be spoiled.

Fuck this _|_

If you're not the one, then why does your name resounds, in my head.

I'm back from my family chalet.

Damn tired i tell you. First day, after all the friendly @ NUS handball court. Won practically every match. I did some funny & stupid stuffs also. I even played Pivot. & i scored one fastbreak! :D BY A PIVOT! :D Haha, awesome. We boys had lotsa fun too! Taking pictures with each other, individual photo for Handball Stuffs. The boys also took photos with Coach Huan! :D

Then match finished.

Went to eat, then trained from Clementi - Tenah Merah. It's a hell of a long ride when you're alone :/ Alright alright, so reach Tenah Merah, waited for 30minutes till the shuttle bus came. Then reached the chalet @ around 7 plus 8. & they were BBQ-ing already. So i went in & joined in. We had our cousins talk. Slowly a few by few came. Haha. Aiyah, also nothing much to talk about. Just quite normal loh? Then for the entire night, Lingsheng, Fanglian's boyfriend (Zhenghuan) & Me sat outside the chalet. & we talked and talked. I slept on the hammock, for only less than 2 hours. But they only took a slight nap. Close eyes to rest only. Didn't really sleep. So woke up, still very early morning.

Then, i went to the toilet to urinate,

then came back. Saw my other cousin woke up, so asked him to come out to talk. He damn cute, he knows he's tired, but never say. Haha. So he went out, & he sat by us, then after awhile, he went to sit by the fish pond, then after that he took my other cousin that he found a super perfect spot, THE NEARBY SWING! So he went, & he came back after awhile, & complained, 'Wahlao, very hard siah, cannot sleep.' Because the swing, is not like normal swing. It's wooden de, then can sit up to 3 person one. So yah, he complaining, then went back into the chalet to sleep ._. Damn cute lah he. Haha. So after awhile, the sky turned brighter, & the cousins started waking up already. Haha. So we went to play basketball @ 9am, till 10am. Then went back to chalet. Ate instant noodles for breakfast. Haha. So 'healthy'.

Then,

finished eating, went to the bowling centre, & started bowling. Damn, I'm not the bowling type man! My ball, keep going into the gutters. Except for some lucky strikes. HAHAHA :D W had 20 person playing, so divided ourselves into 4 groups, 5 person each. The bottom 2 groups will have to pay for everyone! So we played 2 rounds, first round warmup match, My group won with the highest score. Then 2nd match, very close fight with everyone in the start! Then keep striking! & we had a few lucky ones too! :D In the end, My group won with the highest score again! Lucky us! No need to pay for the bowling. So = we get to play 2 rounds of bowling for, FREEE! :D

After that, went back to eat Curry Chicken! :D Haha, had so much fun eating the chicken leg! :D HAHA. Then after that, i was too tired, so went to sleep @ the chalet upstairs. then i was awoken by my cousins asking me to go eat. Damn tired lahzxzx. So went down, eateat. Then i forgotten what i do already ._. Then i forgotten what i do already lah. Just know we BBQ again, then sleep, wake up, cabbed home by cousins. Cabbed till Cck stadium there. Then walked home alone. :D Slept, woke up, & then came online already. But still damn tired lah. Aiyah, nevermind.

Tomorrow is the release of the Olevels Results.

I don't know how to explain my feelings or mood right now. Except for nervous, & afraid. I know I'll disappoint mum. I know i surely will disappoint my entire family. Idk, i just don't know what to do or what to say when i get my results tomorrow. Whether should i silently leave the school, or just hide @ one very corner. But all i know, i need you. I will need you there. & I'll need a hug. I knew this day was coming when i just finished my Olevels. But now, I'll seriously wish for another chance. Just one more chance, I've learnt my lessons, & i really need a second chance to mend the mistakes.

I'm sorry, mum.

If you're not the one,Then why does my soul feels glad, today?

Sorry.

I'm sorry for not putting myself in your shoes. I'm guilty of what happened yesterday. I'm sorry that i made you cry. I just don't know how to say the right things. & i always seemed to say the wrong ones. & it ends up, hurting people around me or my own friends. I'm a ignorant asshole @ times. I admit, i really am. & I'm sorry about that. I miss you too. I think of you @ times when you couldn't come out with me. I think of you when I've so damn bored & have nothing to do. & i thought about you last night. I was feeling so guilty. I was afraid you couldn't sleep. You have school today. But it was so late already, & you told me you're thinking about stuffs. I wanted to ask what it was. & it ought to be obvious already. But i still really couldn't tell what you was thinking about. I wanted to ask, but i'm afraid i'll say the wrong things. I wanted to console you, but i didn't know how. I wanted to be there for you @ the very moment, but i couldn't leave house. I wanted to make you feel better, but i simply didn't know how. I'm falling for you, slowly. Bit by bit, seconds by seconds, & everytime i miss you, the feelings just seems to grow stronger by little bit. Yeah, you might just be a crush. But that's how love forms isn't it? It starts from a crush, then to a like, then to a feeling, & slowly, it turns to become a matured love. We'll get there soon. We will get there, together. I'll get over her, but i need you help. I need all the moral support i could get from you. I need all the care and concern i could get from you. I need all the love i can get from you. & most importantly, i need you. So please my love. Please be here for me whenever i need you. I'll be a better lover. I'll be one. Just wait and see. We'll go through this together. I know we will. Please do trust me, because i'll learn, to trust you & confide my everything to you.

I've got nothing to hide now. It's now posted up on my blog, & everyone that reads my blog, knows that i have someone that i'm fond of already, but they have yet to have any idea who you are. Then soon, your name will be written @ my introduction sidebar. & all my post will simply just be about you, you, you, & you. (:

Let me share a video with you guys!
This guy, David MeShow, he's damn awesome i tell you. He has a band. & guess what? The band is made up of, HIMSELF! Cool right? There's drums, lead, guitar, bass, piano, & so much more. He even Beatbox. How cool is that? If you're interested in seeing more. Just go to his Youtube channel. Damn awesome i tell you. Nevermind, i shall not talk much. Just go see it! :D

HIHI!

Been busy with trainings & the editing of my blog. There's alot of be done. I still wanna make it simple, but still as attractable. I think I'll continue using the old skin. Which is from blogger. Haha. I shall change the colour some other day. Haha.

Anyway, there might be possibilities that i might not get to buy any new year clothes :/ Due to some family reasons. So yah, you might just see me wearing the old clothes to visit your house :/ Nevermind, just have to bear with it.

Pisces Horoscope.

There I someone that you absolutely have to talk to today, Pisces. There may not be a way of getting around it even if you try to. This could turn out to be surprisingly favorable, and may even lead to an exciting friendship once you get past what's in the past; forgiveness is in the air today as well. You could be feeling luckier than usual, but don't try to talk your way out of trouble today, you will only talk yourself further in. Simply "own up" and expect everything to be OK; it will.

Pisces Love Horoscope

You are going through a period of emotional intensity, Pisces, but this is not the heavy intensity that you have been dealing with as of late. In this period, you can expect relationships to deepen and grow and even penetrate on a very personal level. All that you need to do is initiate the process, but for you this is easier said than done. There is a situation that has required your initiative for some time now, but your pride has been holding you back. How you choose to handle this situation in this period could have implications that last a life time, and the window of opportunity may well be closing on you. If you take the steps necessary today, you will find a deeper understanding and a bond that can not be penetrated grow between you and that person you are longing for.

O'levels Results Release Dates. By MOE.

Release of 2009 GCE O-Level Examination Results and 2010 Admission Exercises for Junior Colleges, Millenia Institute, Polytechnics and Institute of Technical Education

1The results of the 2009 Singapore-Cambridge General Certificate of Education Ordinary Level (GCE O-Level) Examination will be released on Monday, 11 January 2010.

2School candidates may collect their results from their schools at 2.00 pm on 11 January 2010. Private candidates will be informed of their results by post. They may also access their results through the Singapore Examinations and Assessment Board website from 2.00 pm on 11 January 2010.

For more information, please log on to http://www.moe.gov.sg/media/press/2010/01/o-level-results-jae-jpsae-2010.php

Possibly my bestest Newyear Countdown Ever.

Training Camp Day 4 Cum 2010 New Year Countdown.

Morning court training.

We were doing drills & runs. I think everyone was feeling tired, exhausted & lethargic from the previous days trainings. That's why causing everyone to be slower than usual. So as a result, Coach got really pissed & asked the entire group to do suicides. I forgotten how many sets, but all i know was that everyone was awake and even more exhausted after that. So while doing the suicide halfway, i heard a tear in my shoes. I looked @ it, & guess what happened! MY SHOE SOLES TORE! ._. WTH!

&

Yesterday was the release of the results of the Final 14 Representees for the Youth Olympic Games Handball Training Squad. There was Interviews by our own Coach Kelvin. I was around the last 5 in the squad to get interviewed. So i was damn nervous. Some came back, with tear drops in the eyes. Some strong players didn't get selected. It's quite hurting to see, so we comforted, hugged and shook each other's hands. It's like the motive of this camp is to get one another closer to each other, something like being a closer 2nd Family. Indeed, we became like family. The boys were all like brothers, and when some of the close ones didn't make, you feel pain in your heart. But yet, no words can comfort the way they feel. Seriously, only till that moment, everyone felt like a family. Perhaps it was the movie that motivated us & brought us all closer together.

To Jeckie & Alvin: I don't suppose the both of you will be able to see this but I'll still just write it down. Don't worry boys, we'll still have a chance to get back together Next month. You both will be back @ Febuary isn't it? Take things easy okay? Train up well and go for it okay? Jiayou! :D

Then soon it was my turn to be interviewed by coach. Before i went for the interview. One of my winger boys told me that I'm in already. because coach told him. So i wasn't as tensed as before. Then as I was walking, i was smiling to myself. I was less than 5 metres away from coach, i felt the feeling of happiness @ the peak. I sat, & the first thing he said was, "I'm sorry, you didn't make it into the team.". HAHAHA, KIDDINGG!~ The first thing he said was, "Congratulations on being selected as the main 14 for the team." I TELL YOU, I IMMEDIATELY SMILED LIKE CRAZYY!~ But i must maintain mah, in front of coach cannot over-happy, scully later he change his mind. So if you know me well, guess what i would do? OF COURSE IS AT THERE KEEP GIGGLING LAH! Hahaha, he should understand that this is a super duper happy thing lah. Hahah. Then He told me the good & bad points of me. I shall tell you what he said, but not the exact same points. It's something like this.

Bad Points.

• I'm not focus ENOUGH during trainings.
• & My commitment to handball.
• Focus easily lost during the game

Good Points.

• Hand Movement slow in bringing up hand and release.
• I'm the Most Agile Player in the team.
• One of the best Handball Player in the team.
• Top 10 best player in the team. (But when I'm not focus, I'm bottom 3)
• I've got good movement during the games.
• I've a few good cutting skills displayed on court.

See the last good point? I keep thinking, cause in our team, Wilmer is like play as well as me for wingers. So like if he say if I'm focus, I'm @ top 7? TOP 7 MEANS THE MAIN PLAYERS LEY! :DDDD Hahaha. Chillchill. Relax. Okay, this ain't tat great yet. I've got a surprise from the boys.

I got back from the interview,

Walked back to the boys, where everyone sits in a circle, when someone is done with the interview, he'll walk back, if he's selected, he'll walk around clapping hands with everyone. But if he's not, he'll just sit. Then I walked around clapping hands with everyone. & Jason suddenly called out to me & said that he's got something to tell me. At first, i thought he wanted to congratulate me. So of course i went towards him, then i shook hands with him & Johner. Then Jason asked, when my birthday was. Then Minpei by the side was guessing. At first guessed 3rd March, close. Haha. Then i said close, then she said 2nd March. Haha. Gosh, she actually did remembered mine. Then Jason pulled me closer & talk in a soft tone, saying,

"The entire handball team is gonna buy you a new pair of court shoes for you for your birthday as your shoes just spoiled today. But your birthday is too far apart. & it was suppose to be a surprise, but we were afraid that you'll go buy, so i tell you now. So you cannot buy uh! We find one day we accompany you out to let you choose your shoes."

I gotta tell you, i was speechless @ the moment. I thought it was a prank or something. Then Jason told me just take it as to pay off for my efforts in the team. I tell you, i almost cried man. We really are one whole family. Court shoes are damn expensive. Ranging from S$80 -S$100+ . Depending on the quality & stuff lah. Seriously damn touching. Very seldom get treated like this. The tears is already like @ the eyeballs already loh. Then he asked me not to worry. They all will share money buy for me, so it wouldn't be that expensive. I'm happy to know that they want to buy for me. I will admit that i need a new pair of court shoes. But i can't accept such an expensive shoes. I'd very much like to accept it. But I really don't wanna owe anyone a favor. If it's only cheaper, maybe i could accept it. Hope you all understand, my team boys. Remember guys, we must customize and make a shirt of our own. @ the back of the shirt, should be written "Handball Family". Haha, afterall, we're a family now. Okay? :D

After this,

I went home from the Barbecue. Around 8 plus 9. Reached home, texted Mama & asked her if i could stay over. Of course, her normal answer would be, "No, come home before .. " So of course i got quite irritated. Like i had my Handball Camp for 4 days straight, & it's New Year Countdown, why can't i go out and have fun? So i told her, "Okay, then I'll take the last train home." Then she agreed of course. Hahaha.! So went out, dressed till super simple. Cause i don't have any nice clothes or shoes. Mingwei knows it. Haha. So wore a worn out black shorts, & a 1 year old shirt. Haha. Brother bought the shirt for me 2 years ago. During 2008. Hahaha. So slipped on with a red flip-flop. Haha. So left out with my Wallet, Music player, & definitely my phone. I can't leave home without them :D So went to Lot1 to meet Mingwei, Joseph & Gordon. So left home, walked to Yewtee then trained to Lot1. Reached, then saw Venie & Jeslyn was there too. But yah, I was tired. So wasn't really high. So we left for our destination @ Raffles place to go see the Fireworks. On the train, i was trying to sleep, but i just simply can't. So took my my Music Player to try to get me into sleep. But to no avail, i failed.

Let's skipskip.

Soon we reached Raffles Place. & there i was, trying to get myself hyped up so i wouldn't be a spoil-spot. & indeed, i finally managed to. We were walking to find a spot where we could see clearly. So we walked and walked, joked and joked, crapped and crapped. The fireworks display soon started. Everyone was on high already. Our whole bunch there, kept shouting and screaming. It's like @ there, i think we're like the highest and most hyper ones already. Haha. Then after that, around 10-15 minutes later. The fireworks display had ended, & we headed to Boat Quay. We wanted to drink a little. So we went to somewhere where we can buy alcohol. So venie accompanied me, & we saw this friendly guy, he helped up to buy 2 cartons of Heineken. So total 12 cans. Haha. & so he asked, "You only came with your girlfriend?" I gotta admit, My heart was itching. & i replied, "Nah, not really. I came with my other friends too. They're outside." I wondered what made he feel she was my girlfriend. (If only she could be)

So i paid him back,

& we wished each other a Happy New Year & departed by our own ways. So we went on to drink with the rest. All drank except Jeslyn. So we sat by the corridors of some shops. & started drinking. Venie needed the loo, so i accompanied her there. So many things happened while we walked there. I don't think it's suitable to be written here though. We went from one coffee-shop to another. Hoping to find a toilet. Then walked for like 5 minutes plus, with our hands crossed hoping to find a toilet. Then we saw Zhong Ben. Last time unity secondary de. He came out from one place. He was looking for a toilet too ._. Haha. Then he asked if i saw a toilet. Then i told him, nope. No idea, we're looking for one too. Haha. Then we walked to the back alley with him and his female friend. Haha. But still no toilet. Then walked to another side. Saw this Korean/Japanese restaurant. Then i asked Ben if want to use or not. Then he say, "Siao uh? Cannot use one lah!" So i said i went in to ask. & It is damn kind of the owner to actually allow the three of them to use the toilet for free :D

So they all proceeded to use the loo.

& there was this toy poodle. Super duper cute i tell you ! :D Haha. So as they were using they toilet, Venie & me was playing with the dog. I think the dog was like attracted to my leg hair._. HAHAHA. Venie was playing with he dog first. Then i squat down, it came to rub me. Then super cute, the dog was like, wanna smooch me like that. As i was squatting, there's this gap in between my legs. So the dog actually went in the middle and it's paws was on my pants. & it's face was facing up. I wished i could take a picture, but i forgot :X haha. But it was damn cute. I'm getting 3 kinds of dogs when i grow and & is able to afford one. Either a maltese, toy poodle, or not is this dog, which i have no idea about the breed, but it has the body like a sausage dog, but with fur. & head like a fox. HAHAHA. Daamn cute, someone who stays around my block has this dog. Thn everytime i see it. I wished i could go forward to ask what breed is it. Haha. But i think Pang knows the breed. We were talking about it that day.

Okayokay,

back to where we were. So we used the toilet. Then we walked back to where the rest was waiting for us. So we walked closed together, to avoid being lost ._. HAHAHA! Till we see the rest. Went back, continue drinking. then after that, gordon wanted to go find his friend. i wished i had a private blog to post some other private stuffs. Nevermind. I'm gonna be lazy and just stick to this one. Hahaha. Then i stood up, pulled her up by the hands, then started walking. So we walked to don't know which station. Needed to cross the roads. Wahlao, scary lah those kinda roads. That's why i hate heavy traffics.! NEHNEH.

So we crossed the road,

(private). Ahh, all these privates are for myself. You don't have to know :X haha. It's all for me to know, & you to find out if you wanna know :D & as we were walking, (private). & soon, we reached the don't know which station. I can't remember properly. But i remembered, during the period when we were wishing everyone around us happy new year, we were also disturbing other people by also saying merry christmas. So we were walking up this escalator, & we were wishing happy new year, then a soft voice came from the back saying Merry Christmas. HAHAHA! Guess who it was, it was Jeslyn.! She wished the wrong statement! HAHAHA! Then lucky the person was also like us very high one.! :X Then said something like what then got one "Oh nevermind lah, Belated Christmas." Then everyone burst into laughter! :D Then soon, we entered the Mrt, & went to the very back of the train. Mingwei was doing his dog pee, while everyone else sitting down on the floor. Venie started taking pictures, of Joseph & Jeslyn, Of herself with Jeslyn. & one accidental picture on Mingwei dogpee. HAHA! I don't really like cameras, so yah. Didn't take. Train came, boarded it. & gordon needed to go find his friend, so he alighted @ another stop. While we all went back to yewtee.

Then we still had a few cans left. So we went to Yewtee foodcourt & ate as everyone was starving ._. So all of us ate Kway Chap. So this Venie uh, very TIKEE uh! I was eating, then never really see my Kway Chap plate. Then i was eating eating eating. Then it's like i turned and see, suddenly i got super alot of TAOKEE. WAHLAO, This itchy backside gave me her taokee/taopok. Then i gave to Joseph :D After that, we went up to the Carpark to continue drinking. & my cough acted up again _|_ So Venie, Mingwei, Joseph, Jeslyn & I were sitting by the stairs, & drinking. So i was coughing ._. & venie asked me to stop drinking already. Say later it might get worst. (I didn't wanna stop drinking, because i like this feeling when you care so much about me.) .

So yah, then i was still drinking, as it was a happy occasion. Indeed a super duper happy one for me :D Although it started off with a wrong foot @ first. Then we went to Kellin's house. Joseph fetched Jeslyn back so it was left with Me, Venie & Ahwei. So we walked there. Reached about soon, so went up. Kellin's friends was there. & i sat alone, still drinking ._. Then soon, Yvonne came. She was moody, so both of us went out of the room for private chats. Like we normally do :D HAHAH. So both of us sat by the Kitchen floor, & she begun telling me about what happened. So we were sharing quite a few stuffs & was catching up with one another. Then soon, kellin came out & opened a red wine. YAYY! Drank again, but soon, i realised i K.O while i was just taking a rest with my heads down. K.O all the way till 5 plus 6 am. Woke up by their super duper loud laughters. Throwing things here and there. Like some crazy people. My head was banging, & a little of the hangover effect was taking place. I felt you touched me asking me how i was for a few times when i K.O-ed. I was too tired to move, but i could still move and hear. Thanks, & it was really nice of you :D You know who you are, i hope.

Then,

It soon turned into an ugly sight when i woke up, kellin started vomiting everything that she drank. She was puking all over her house. Poor kengann gotta help her clean it up. So after that, i went to the Sofa to sit. & there you came, showing concern towards me like how you did almost 2 years ago. You were holding onto my arms and asking me if i needed you to walk me home. You can never know the urge inside of me, wanting to say yes. But i just couldn't bring myself to say that. Instead, i wanted to walk you home, because i thought you needed someone to walk you home. & it's also late already. I was late for home, very late. I left, hoping you'll walk behind me. Just me and you, walking home together, again. But to my disappointment, you didn't follow up. Yvonne insisted to send me home, but i rejected. But the person wasn't you. If at that moment you came alone, i'd have agreed straight away.

(I can't believe that I'm actually disclosing my personal & private thoughts & feelings out here @ blogger. Dang. I'm sorry girl. But i just had to post this. From the past 1 year 9-10 months ago, this was the best day that i could get & receive from you.)

Then, 2 of you came into the lift,

& i insisted that i walked alone. But you could have stayed, & not walked back. My heart fell from the top floor to the 1st. My heart was aching knowing that you didn't insist on staying. But you went up. I swear it was tearing me apart. But it's okay. I've changed my idea of pain. Pain can sometimes be pleasure, while pleasure can sometimes be pain. I walked & walked. I thought & thought. Sat down by the playground, stayed till somewhere 7 plus. Then went home. Had a clear mind when i was home. Reached home, everyone asleep. Faster sneek in & showered & jumped to bed!-Holding hands. -Our hands was still in contact.

If only/maybe,

You could remembered what exactly happened that night, would you consider for another time, whether if you'd wanna be like this & hold on together with our hands locked together for the rest of our lives again? I've got so many doubts and questions in my mind on that day, till now. I need to get the load off my mind if not i don't know how i'm supposed to carry on. I wished that all the moments with you could last longer. I know maybe because you were semi-unconscious, but nevertheless, i enjoyed that slight moment with you. I never want it to end, but unfortunately, it ended.

Thoughts.

- I hope yesterday would be as long as today.

- Regardless of how you look, with makeup or without, with chocolate on your face, whether you have dark eyes rings or not, I still think you're the prettiest girl in the world.

- If you're not semi-unconscious,

& you're in a very clear state of mind. Why did you do that for?

- You did that,

because you missed me, or is it him?

- They wouldn't understand why i love you so much.

- "You came with your girlfriend only?"

- He asked, "You both together how long already?" "2 years," she said.

- Day out,

With a girl that like me, and a girl that i love.