Training Camp Day 4 Cum 2010 New Year Countdown.
Morning court training.
We were doing drills & runs. I think everyone was feeling tired, exhausted & lethargic from the previous days trainings. That's why causing everyone to be slower than usual. So as a result, Coach got really pissed & asked the entire group to do suicides. I forgotten how many sets, but all i know was that everyone was awake and even more exhausted after that. So while doing the suicide halfway, i heard a tear in my shoes. I looked @ it, & guess what happened! MY SHOE SOLES TORE! ._. WTH!
&
Yesterday was the release of the results of the Final 14 Representees for the Youth Olympic Games Handball Training Squad. There was Interviews by our own Coach Kelvin. I was around the last 5 in the squad to get interviewed. So i was damn nervous. Some came back, with tear drops in the eyes. Some strong players didn't get selected. It's quite hurting to see, so we comforted, hugged and shook each other's hands. It's like the motive of this camp is to get one another closer to each other, something like being a closer 2nd Family. Indeed, we became like family. The boys were all like brothers, and when some of the close ones didn't make, you feel pain in your heart. But yet, no words can comfort the way they feel. Seriously, only till that moment, everyone felt like a family. Perhaps it was the movie that motivated us & brought us all closer together.
To Jeckie & Alvin: I don't suppose the both of you will be able to see this but I'll still just write it down. Don't worry boys, we'll still have a chance to get back together Next month. You both will be back @ Febuary isn't it? Take things easy okay? Train up well and go for it okay? Jiayou! :D
Then soon it was my turn to be interviewed by coach. Before i went for the interview. One of my winger boys told me that I'm in already. because coach told him. So i wasn't as tensed as before. Then as I was walking, i was smiling to myself. I was less than 5 metres away from coach, i felt the feeling of happiness @ the peak. I sat, & the first thing he said was, "I'm sorry, you didn't make it into the team.". HAHAHA, KIDDINGG!~ The first thing he said was, "Congratulations on being selected as the main 14 for the team." I TELL YOU, I IMMEDIATELY SMILED LIKE CRAZYY!~ But i must maintain mah, in front of coach cannot over-happy, scully later he change his mind. So if you know me well, guess what i would do? OF COURSE IS AT THERE KEEP GIGGLING LAH! Hahaha, he should understand that this is a super duper happy thing lah. Hahah. Then He told me the good & bad points of me. I shall tell you what he said, but not the exact same points. It's something like this.
Bad Points.
- I'm not focus ENOUGH during trainings.
- & My commitment to handball.
- Focus easily lost during the game
- Hand Movement slow in bringing up hand and release.
- I'm the Most Agile Player in the team.
- One of the best Handball Player in the team.
- Top 10 best player in the team. (But when I'm not focus, I'm bottom 3)
- I've got good movement during the games.
- I've a few good cutting skills displayed on court.
See the last good point? I keep thinking, cause in our team, Wilmer is like play as well as me for wingers. So like if he say if I'm focus, I'm @ top 7? TOP 7 MEANS THE MAIN PLAYERS LEY! :DDDD Hahaha. Chillchill. Relax. Okay, this ain't tat great yet. I've got a surprise from the boys.
I got back from the interview,
Walked back to the boys, where everyone sits in a circle, when someone is done with the interview, he'll walk back, if he's selected, he'll walk around clapping hands with everyone. But if he's not, he'll just sit. Then I walked around clapping hands with everyone. & Jason suddenly called out to me & said that he's got something to tell me. At first, i thought he wanted to congratulate me. So of course i went towards him, then i shook hands with him & Johner. Then Jason asked, when my birthday was. Then Minpei by the side was guessing. At first guessed 3rd March, close. Haha. Then i said close, then she said 2nd March. Haha. Gosh, she actually did remembered mine. Then Jason pulled me closer & talk in a soft tone, saying,
"The entire handball team is gonna buy you a new pair of court shoes for you for your birthday as your shoes just spoiled today. But your birthday is too far apart. & it was suppose to be a surprise, but we were afraid that you'll go buy, so i tell you now. So you cannot buy uh! We find one day we accompany you out to let you choose your shoes."
I gotta tell you, i was speechless @ the moment. I thought it was a prank or something. Then Jason told me just take it as to pay off for my efforts in the team. I tell you, i almost cried man. We really are one whole family. Court shoes are damn expensive. Ranging from S$80 -S$100+ . Depending on the quality & stuff lah. Seriously damn touching. Very seldom get treated like this. The tears is already like @ the eyeballs already loh. Then he asked me not to worry. They all will share money buy for me, so it wouldn't be that expensive. I'm happy to know that they want to buy for me. I will admit that i need a new pair of court shoes. But i can't accept such an expensive shoes. I'd very much like to accept it. But I really don't wanna owe anyone a favor. If it's only cheaper, maybe i could accept it. Hope you all understand, my team boys. Remember guys, we must customize and make a shirt of our own. @ the back of the shirt, should be written "Handball Family". Haha, afterall, we're a family now. Okay? :D
After this,
I went home from the Barbecue. Around 8 plus 9. Reached home, texted Mama & asked her if i could stay over. Of course, her normal answer would be, "No, come home before .. " So of course i got quite irritated. Like i had my Handball Camp for 4 days straight, & it's New Year Countdown, why can't i go out and have fun? So i told her, "Okay, then I'll take the last train home." Then she agreed of course. Hahaha.! So went out, dressed till super simple. Cause i don't have any nice clothes or shoes. Mingwei knows it. Haha. So wore a worn out black shorts, & a 1 year old shirt. Haha. Brother bought the shirt for me 2 years ago. During 2008. Hahaha. So slipped on with a red flip-flop. Haha. So left out with my Wallet, Music player, & definitely my phone. I can't leave home without them :D So went to Lot1 to meet Mingwei, Joseph & Gordon. So left home, walked to Yewtee then trained to Lot1. Reached, then saw Venie & Jeslyn was there too. But yah, I was tired. So wasn't really high. So we left for our destination @ Raffles place to go see the Fireworks. On the train, i was trying to sleep, but i just simply can't. So took my my Music Player to try to get me into sleep. But to no avail, i failed.
Let's skipskip.
Let's skipskip.
Soon we reached Raffles Place. & there i was, trying to get myself hyped up so i wouldn't be a spoil-spot. & indeed, i finally managed to. We were walking to find a spot where we could see clearly. So we walked and walked, joked and joked, crapped and crapped. The fireworks display soon started. Everyone was on high already. Our whole bunch there, kept shouting and screaming. It's like @ there, i think we're like the highest and most hyper ones already. Haha. Then after that, around 10-15 minutes later. The fireworks display had ended, & we headed to Boat Quay. We wanted to drink a little. So we went to somewhere where we can buy alcohol. So venie accompanied me, & we saw this friendly guy, he helped up to buy 2 cartons of Heineken. So total 12 cans. Haha. & so he asked, "You only came with your girlfriend?" I gotta admit, My heart was itching. & i replied, "Nah, not really. I came with my other friends too. They're outside." I wondered what made he feel she was my girlfriend. (If only she could be)
So i paid him back,
& we wished each other a Happy New Year & departed by our own ways. So we went on to drink with the rest. All drank except Jeslyn. So we sat by the corridors of some shops. & started drinking. Venie needed the loo, so i accompanied her there. So many things happened while we walked there. I don't think it's suitable to be written here though. We went from one coffee-shop to another. Hoping to find a toilet. Then walked for like 5 minutes plus, with our hands crossed hoping to find a toilet. Then we saw Zhong Ben. Last time unity secondary de. He came out from one place. He was looking for a toilet too ._. Haha. Then he asked if i saw a toilet. Then i told him, nope. No idea, we're looking for one too. Haha. Then we walked to the back alley with him and his female friend. Haha. But still no toilet. Then walked to another side. Saw this Korean/Japanese restaurant. Then i asked Ben if want to use or not. Then he say, "Siao uh? Cannot use one lah!" So i said i went in to ask. & It is damn kind of the owner to actually allow the three of them to use the toilet for free :D
So they all proceeded to use the loo.
& there was this toy poodle. Super duper cute i tell you ! :D Haha. So as they were using they toilet, Venie & me was playing with the dog. I think the dog was like attracted to my leg hair._. HAHAHA. Venie was playing with he dog first. Then i squat down, it came to rub me. Then super cute, the dog was like, wanna smooch me like that. As i was squatting, there's this gap in between my legs. So the dog actually went in the middle and it's paws was on my pants. & it's face was facing up. I wished i could take a picture, but i forgot :X haha. But it was damn cute. I'm getting 3 kinds of dogs when i grow and & is able to afford one. Either a maltese, toy poodle, or not is this dog, which i have no idea about the breed, but it has the body like a sausage dog, but with fur. & head like a fox. HAHAHA. Daamn cute, someone who stays around my block has this dog. Thn everytime i see it. I wished i could go forward to ask what breed is it. Haha. But i think Pang knows the breed. We were talking about it that day.
Okayokay,
back to where we were. So we used the toilet. Then we walked back to where the rest was waiting for us. So we walked closed together, to avoid being lost ._. HAHAHA! Till we see the rest. Went back, continue drinking. then after that, gordon wanted to go find his friend. i wished i had a private blog to post some other private stuffs. Nevermind. I'm gonna be lazy and just stick to this one. Hahaha. Then i stood up, pulled her up by the hands, then started walking. So we walked to don't know which station. Needed to cross the roads. Wahlao, scary lah those kinda roads. That's why i hate heavy traffics.! NEHNEH.
So we crossed the road,
(private). Ahh, all these privates are for myself. You don't have to know :X haha. It's all for me to know, & you to find out if you wanna know :D & as we were walking, (private). & soon, we reached the don't know which station. I can't remember properly. But i remembered, during the period when we were wishing everyone around us happy new year, we were also disturbing other people by also saying merry christmas. So we were walking up this escalator, & we were wishing happy new year, then a soft voice came from the back saying Merry Christmas. HAHAHA! Guess who it was, it was Jeslyn.! She wished the wrong statement! HAHAHA! Then lucky the person was also like us very high one.! :X Then said something like what then got one "Oh nevermind lah, Belated Christmas." Then everyone burst into laughter! :D Then soon, we entered the Mrt, & went to the very back of the train. Mingwei was doing his dog pee, while everyone else sitting down on the floor. Venie started taking pictures, of Joseph & Jeslyn, Of herself with Jeslyn. & one accidental picture on Mingwei dogpee. HAHA! I don't really like cameras, so yah. Didn't take. Train came, boarded it. & gordon needed to go find his friend, so he alighted @ another stop. While we all went back to yewtee.
Then we still had a few cans left. So we went to Yewtee foodcourt & ate as everyone was starving ._. So all of us ate Kway Chap. So this Venie uh, very TIKEE uh! I was eating, then never really see my Kway Chap plate. Then i was eating eating eating. Then it's like i turned and see, suddenly i got super alot of TAOKEE. WAHLAO, This itchy backside gave me her taokee/taopok. Then i gave to Joseph :D After that, we went up to the Carpark to continue drinking. & my cough acted up again _|_ So Venie, Mingwei, Joseph, Jeslyn & I were sitting by the stairs, & drinking. So i was coughing ._. & venie asked me to stop drinking already. Say later it might get worst. (I didn't wanna stop drinking, because i like this feeling when you care so much about me.) .
So yah, then i was still drinking, as it was a happy occasion. Indeed a super duper happy one for me :D Although it started off with a wrong foot @ first. Then we went to Kellin's house. Joseph fetched Jeslyn back so it was left with Me, Venie & Ahwei. So we walked there. Reached about soon, so went up. Kellin's friends was there. & i sat alone, still drinking ._. Then soon, Yvonne came. She was moody, so both of us went out of the room for private chats. Like we normally do :D HAHAH. So both of us sat by the Kitchen floor, & she begun telling me about what happened. So we were sharing quite a few stuffs & was catching up with one another. Then soon, kellin came out & opened a red wine. YAYY! Drank again, but soon, i realised i K.O while i was just taking a rest with my heads down. K.O all the way till 5 plus 6 am. Woke up by their super duper loud laughters. Throwing things here and there. Like some crazy people. My head was banging, & a little of the hangover effect was taking place. I felt you touched me asking me how i was for a few times when i K.O-ed. I was too tired to move, but i could still move and hear. Thanks, & it was really nice of you :D You know who you are, i hope.
Then,
It soon turned into an ugly sight when i woke up, kellin started vomiting everything that she drank. She was puking all over her house. Poor kengann gotta help her clean it up. So after that, i went to the Sofa to sit. & there you came, showing concern towards me like how you did almost 2 years ago. You were holding onto my arms and asking me if i needed you to walk me home. You can never know the urge inside of me, wanting to say yes. But i just couldn't bring myself to say that. Instead, i wanted to walk you home, because i thought you needed someone to walk you home. & it's also late already. I was late for home, very late. I left, hoping you'll walk behind me. Just me and you, walking home together, again. But to my disappointment, you didn't follow up. Yvonne insisted to send me home, but i rejected. But the person wasn't you. If at that moment you came alone, i'd have agreed straight away.
(I can't believe that I'm actually disclosing my personal & private thoughts & feelings out here @ blogger. Dang. I'm sorry girl. But i just had to post this. From the past 1 year 9-10 months ago, this was the best day that i could get & receive from you.)
Then, 2 of you came into the lift,
& i insisted that i walked alone. But you could have stayed, & not walked back. My heart fell from the top floor to the 1st. My heart was aching knowing that you didn't insist on staying. But you went up. I swear it was tearing me apart. But it's okay. I've changed my idea of pain. Pain can sometimes be pleasure, while pleasure can sometimes be pain. I walked & walked. I thought & thought. Sat down by the playground, stayed till somewhere 7 plus. Then went home. Had a clear mind when i was home. Reached home, everyone asleep. Faster sneek in & showered & jumped to bed!-Holding hands. -Our hands was still in contact.
If only/maybe,
You could remembered what exactly happened that night, would you consider for another time, whether if you'd wanna be like this & hold on together with our hands locked together for the rest of our lives again? I've got so many doubts and questions in my mind on that day, till now. I need to get the load off my mind if not i don't know how i'm supposed to carry on. I wished that all the moments with you could last longer. I know maybe because you were semi-unconscious, but nevertheless, i enjoyed that slight moment with you. I never want it to end, but unfortunately, it ended.
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